Drifting away from porn to focus on full service

I’ve been a sex worker for over 3 years, and apart from stripping I dipped my toe into basically everything. Content creation, modelling, porn, dominatrix, camming, full service … I started as a “content creator” just as a little creative project. I wasn’t even gonna go full nude, but because I enjoyed it so much I naturally progressed my content from nudes to porn. But I never lost my main aim, which was to make it authentic, the best possible quality, and most importantly - real. Real passion, kissing, cuddling, ear whispering, laughing, just everything you miss in mainstream porn. I loved every second of it and I'm so proud of everything I’ve made. But time has changed and the hard work I put into it just isn’t worth the money I make from it. I get it, we’re no longer living in covid times, people are no longer stuck at home desperate for any kind of connection. The internet is oversaturated with hot independent creators and the economy is simply fucked. But I also believe that people don’t realise how much work goes into being a content creator when there is only you doing everything. I now understand why so many girls get an agency to run their site. I understand why they pay someone to do all the messaging with customers. Because juggling it all and not get burnt out or to not lose your shit when messaging with some rude idiot, doesn’t always seem doable.

When it comes to onlyfans/fansly etc. there are plenty of ways that people run it. Someone puts their price between $20-$50 and once you subscribe you get all the content they have, no Pay Per View messages at all. Other people put their price for $3 and in the price are only teasers and you get spammed with PPV messages on a daily basis. I didn’t find any of that ideal. Most people won’t pay more than $15, when they have no idea what they are getting or if it’s worth it. And who likes to be spammed every single day by numerous messages you have to pay for? I don’t like it as a customer and I can’t be bothered sending mass messages on a daily basis either. So I went the nice middle way. I set up my price for $9.99 with most content being in the price. Including full length videos of actual porn with a partner. Then I kept some extras as a PPV that I would send out once a week for still pretty cheap. I kept the price $9.99 for 3 years and only recently put it up to $10.99 after slowly starting to feel like my work isn’t financially appreciated enough. When you join you’re getting three years of my hard work. Numerous hours spent on making the content, editing and posting. But let’s be honest - most people subscribe when the page is on sale and guess what? Then they don’t tip and they don’t buy anything extra either. They will most likely try to suck your energy in the DMs though. And the ones who actually tip to appreciate you, and who you would love to chat with, don’t actually want that sort of interaction. Three years ago I would randomly wake up to $100 tip just as appreciation. Now you ask for $5 for your time when chatting and people won’t pay that. I used to get so many lovely compliments about the effort and creativity I put into my content. Now men are expecting that a date with you is included in the subscription price.

People who do exceptionally well get most of their subscribers by promoting on tiktok. It’s almost impossible to grow on instagram now thanks to the algorithm and the fact your profile won’t be boosted if you show as little as a belly button. Twitter also isn’t what it used to be since Elon Musk took over and most of us don’t even know how many followers we actually have as our following count goes +- 100 on a daily basis. So tiktok is the only place where you can still grow. And you know what? No thanks. My head hurts seeing all the same cringe videos over and over again. I'm too old for making brain-dead clips aka putting my hair into a ponytail and getting on my knees pretending I'm about to suck your cock. I don’t even ever wear a ponytail for that shit. Who has the time to look for a hairband? Just get in my mouth. And you definitely won’t see me making clips of me sitting on a chair and hopping up and down so you see my boobs bounce. When I started I always said I just want to create content that I'm proud of and find fulfilling. I'm planning to stick to that. I could definitely do more collaborations but I'm just way too picky. Not only when it comes to people but also the kind of work they do.

I’ve definitely thought of working for actual porn companies and I did apply to some. But actually getting work from companies that are not as mainstream and are more on the creative side seems almost impossible, unless you have a big following on social media, or you have connections. I usually get the same response - “We’re currently not shooting but we’ll let you know.” And no, sorry, I'm so not going into a fake taxi where I just get railed until I won’t be able to walk afterwards. But as some of you know, I did work for Lustery and that’s been an amazing experience. Probably after making content for them I realised that it’s not really worth it to create any full length high quality porn for my site anymore.

Let’s look at the difference between when me and Marcus made a video independently vs. for Lustery:

Independently: Deciding and discussing what we’re gonna do. Me preparing all my gear meaning charging batteries for my camera, making sure I have SD cards with enough space, tripod, microphone. Then taking it all across London to his place which is one hour and a half away. Setting everything up and filming takes between 1-3 hours. Then putting all the footage into a computer and editing + creating trailers and thumbnails. Making sure you have some SFW stuff to promote on instagram and NSFW content for twitter. That’s all another 2-4 hours. Uploading it everywhere, sending it out and promoting = 2+ hours. Then you send it to to 200 subscribers for $10 and ten of them buy it. That’s $100. -20% cut that onlyfans takes. Leaves you with $80. At least I didn’t have to pay Marcus because it was a collab but if I did I would end up with ridiculous $40. Sure, in time someone else will buy it and it is a footage I’ll have always for sale but I'm sure you can see how the work is just not equal the pay.

But when we work for Lustery: The beginning is the same. But after shooting, we just transfer the footage onto our computer, we send it to them and then we get paid. For our first video we got around £1000 so £500 each. For our vlog we got slightly more and for shorter videos we get slightly less. Once the video is up we have our special link and if people subscribe using that link we get 40%. And we only have to do a little promotion on our social media as Lustery obviously has a big following, so they basically promote us and we gain recognition and reach audience we otherwise wouldn’t have reached. Absolute dream.

Most people think that everyone in porn makes tons of money. But the truth is most of us are struggling. Why? Because people don’t want to pay for porn. They will happily stalk you daily on instagram, twitter, slide into your DMs telling you how great you are but sending you only £5 to show a slight appreciation? Nope. Cause they think someone else will pay. But then everyone has this mindset and suddenly you’re sitting down in your room, wondering if you’re gonna be able to pay rent this month even though you haven’t had a full day off in three weeks and your DMs are always full.

I started doing full service probably after four months of only doing content and camming. It happened very naturally and I loved it. I realised I needed it for balance. Working online is fun but it does get boring and it does get lonely. I'm a person who needs the real life interaction. I need to know that I'm actually living my life and I'm not just wasting it in front of my screen. And it’s the part of my work where I actually feel I'm being paid fairly. I can relax afterwards and not feel like I always have to do more, and most importantly - I'm only giving my energy and attention to the person who paid for it. With online work you always need to entertain freeloaders and posting thirst traps, hoping someone will spend some change on you. Especially during camming when you are wanking on a webcam, 100 people are watching you, but only two people are tipping. I don’t understand how other cam models don’t just get angry and they keep the smile on. It’s also all about putting up a show and performing and making noises you wouldn’t make if you were alone. With full service you just basically have a tinder date that definitely ends with a sexy time. It’s not for everyone. But if you love sex, you love meeting all kinds of people you otherwise wouldn’t have met, and it actually makes you happy to give other people pleasure and comfort? Then it doesn’t feel like work most of the time at all. I find it a lot more fulfiling than rating someone’s dick online. (Sorry not sorry) And I'm definitely not trying to glamorise full service or put down online work, I'm just talking from my own experience and how I'm feeling at this moment. The other thing is that online content gets constantly stolen from any site and is uploaded everywhere for people to watch. Trying to take it take down takes time and costs money and no one can promise you it won’t get uploaded again. It’s a lost battle. And it makes you feel even worse if you don’t make the money you deserve. Should I even mention the online haters? The “You’re too fat. You’re too skinny. You’re too old. You’re basic. You’re a whore. Your parents must be proud. No one will ever love you.” No man ever told me this to my face but they surely love to do it online, probably right after they had a wank over my porn. Something to boost their little fragile ego. Whilst online work makes me doubt myself and makes me consider whether I need a boob job, face lift, 20ml in my lips and brazilian butt lift to be at least slightly attractive, full service makes me feel like the hot bitch that I am. Like what gives you an ego boost more than men of all ages losing their shit when seeing you naked and constantly repeating how beautiful and amazing you are?

I'm recently finding myself not wanting to pick up my actual camera and make any ideas for content. I’ve still been sitting on some photos and videos but I can’t seem to sit down and edit them. Because why would I when most people won’t even hit the like button on OF? And it’s kinda sad for me that I lost my mojo because photography is such a big passion of mine. Whether it’s taking photos of other people, cities, nature or self portraits. But it’s easy to lose the passion when your livelihood depends on it, and it’s not being appreciated the way you wish it was.

I'm definitely not quitting OF but I have no plans to make any porn videos with other people independently anymore. Selfies and short videos it is, for now. Maybe I’ll get my mojo and creativity back. Right now I find it a lot more appealing to spend an evening with a man having an actual conversation about life, having real orgasms and getting some really good money so then I can just come home, relax and do other things that I love - reading books, writing, yoga and as some of you know I'm currently obsessed with lifting and skipping rope. That just sounds so much more fun than spending an evening replying to a man on OF who bought a subscription on sale for $5 and is asking where do I want his cum. Questions like this do get pretty repetitive and boring after three years of getting them over and over again. I don’t know - I used to have some good deep conversations on my site about the human existence after being spoiled with tips, but that doesn’t really happen anymore.

Let’s not forget - sex work is work.

Kisses x

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Why would a woman enjoy having sex for money?

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The contradiction of love